A gentle, strong reminder

If I blog or get online this week (starting tomorrow), I must be caught up on plates for Dad's business and have spent time with God. You have my permission to ask me if I have done this.

Before I enter this commitment, I wanted to apologize for my bad attitude. Having a stressful week, having hormone issues, Karl being gone a lot...all of these are lame excuses for a poor attitude. I was reminded of this after reading a poignant post from my friend, Jen.

Jen's daughter, Emma, is a miracle. Last Valentine's Day, she was born with meconium in much of her body. She barely made it. After app. 2 months in the ICU and hospital, she came home. Jen, Chris, and Emma's road has not been easy these 8 months. Emma is still on a feeding tube with reflux issues, but she is a beautiful, capable, happy little girl. She has recently had a REALLY bad bout with the stomach flu and had to be admitted again to the hospital. In her caring bridge journal (I'd give you the link, but it's password protected...if you really want it, feel free to e-mail me and I'll contact Jen) she writes about an experience with another mom of a special needs, terminal child who is about to turn five (and not supposed to live to be that age). Here is an excerpt from that journal:

"...we began to talk...About faith and roads paved with tears. And as we talked, I realized that I was in the presence of an extraordinary person. Not only was this woman an active duty single mom of a child with VERY special needs, she also possessed a faith in and love for Jesus that made me feel humbled to be in her presence. And completely and utterly ashamed of my judgmental, critical spirit. She assured me that although our road has also been paved with many tears, someday we too would be in a similar place, assuring someone relatively new to the path that God is good and faithful....She told many other stories about the wonders that God had already done and shared how our character and ability to trust God is refined through suffering....All I know is that I was totally and completely humbled by her radiance and her faith and her love for her God and her daughter....I couldn’t help it. I started crying and couldn’t stop. She gave me a hug and said, “You need to take better care of yourself. Crying is therapeutic and you need to do it more often. God knows this and it’s OK.”....I didn’t even know her name. But God once again showed Himself to be good, loving, tender, gracious and kind, and completely aware of our situation and needs in the midst of the storm. (After being home for several days) I feel a little different somewhere inside, different from before we went to the hospital. It’s been a bumpy road of ups and downs, of highs and lows, of moods swinging between faith and despair. But Chris and I have it pretty good. Not only do we have each other, but we have a baby who is living proof of a God who does miracles, answers prayers, and gives us that which we do not deserve....although I didn’t choose [this road] and can’t control it, I want so desperately to walk well. I want this road to make me better and not bitter. I want to be pleasing to God NOW so that when it’s all over, He will be proud of me. I want to take God at His word NOW so that when His promises are fulfilled, I can say, “I knew it!” I want so desperately for others to be changed, or at the very least encouraged to trust God more fully because of what He’s doing in our family...."

Thank you, Jen, for your reflections and vulnerability. Thank you, Holy Spirit, for meeting each of us where we're at--in our pain and in our joy. Forgive me for how often I forget these truths while in the trenches (which, in my case, aren't even bad!) and help me to live more fully and more focused on those things that are truly important.

Some very bad--yet creative--parenting

This week felt very stressful, yet full of joy at the same time. Here are some highlights:

• Here's my recollection of the toothfairy mishap: Braden lost his third tooth at school. As soon as he got home, we put it in the little holder by his bed. Then, I promptly forgot about it. The next morning, Braden came into our room with this horribly sad look on his face: "The toothfairy didn't come." You can imagine how I felt. So, with some very quick thinking, I said something like, "Oh, honey, I'm sure she came! Maybe she just got confused." (As I'm saying this, my back is turned and I'm frantically getting into my dish that has money in it and counting out $2.00). As Braden is explaining that he's checked around and it's no where, I'm signaling/whispering to Karl to "Think of something!" Karl hops out of bed with the money hidden in his hand and goes into Braden room. Let's just say the money is found underneath the pillow of the extra bed in Braden's room, and with the tooth still in it's holder. We chaulked it up to a "toothfairy in training." WHEW
• There were people at our house for meals Sunday, Monday, and Thursday.
• Karl was gone from early morning til 10:30+ Tuesday night.
• Karl was gone until 8:45ish Wednesday night...our friends showed up for some "Settlers of Catan" around 9:15. This was after I'd been babysitting another friends' little ones (6 and 3) for our monthly babysitting swap from about 5:30-8:30.
• I subbed on Friday. As soon as I got home, the boys left for a guy's camping evening. It was supposed to be a camping overnight (with some other dads/sons from our old church, but because of how busy the weekend was, Karl decided to come home)
• That night, I got to go out with my precious friend Jenna for some Chipotle, shopping, and coffee (what a great way to relieve stress!)
• This morning, we had pictures for the boys at church at 10:30. We were home for about an hour and left for a "tree ceremony" for our Ashli. I helped lead music and Karl prepared a little talk (only realizing after we got there that it was only a closing prayer!) It was a really special time organized by Kelly of remembering and laughter some of the great Ashli moments.
• Now, Braden is sitting on my lap, Kole and Owen are watching football and we're waiting for a meal to get done so that we can take it acrossed town to a new little family.

The top "big news" of the week is that starting on Sunday we've been dog sitting a little beagle puppy. Our neighbor found her and travels too much to keep her, so asked if we wanted her. The boys do not know this, but in my mind I thought this week would be a trial to see if my allergies (and nerves) could handle a new addition to the family. Well, she's adorable, but she didn't pass the test. Close, but no. I think my hands have touched enough pee this week to...I don't know what, mabye be germy for the next 3 years at least. My allergies are just too bad along with everything else (like taking a dog out in the winter, for instance!) She's super cuddly, though, and we decided (and then told the boys) that this fall and winter we'd research hypo-allergenic dogs with good dispositions with kids and save up our money for one. I don't know how I feel about taking something else on after a week like this, but I think it's doable and would be good for...well...everyone in the family, perhaps, except me. (Do I sound like a martyr, or what?)

So, that's our week. I'm ready for a clean slate again!!!

Praise and Prayer....Part II

A miracle happened today. Now, it might not be the kind of miracle that everyone drops their jaw and gets goosebumps over, but it's a miracle, nonetheless. If you read the post from yesterday, you know Karl tested positive for tuberculosis, but it was inactive, meaning he was not contagious, just more susceptible to getting TB if there was ever exposure again. The doctor told Karl when he asked for a retest that it was highly unusual for a second negative test after an initial positive, usually the results were even stronger, but she would order it anyway. Here's the miracle: just recently, the children's pastor's wife tested positive for TB and had a second test run which came out negative. Our doctor was pretty insistent that we just shouldn't think much about all that would be required to get "cleared," but to just go ahead and do it. However, because of what happened to Stacy, Karl was strong about desiring another test......and guess what? The test was NEGATIVE! NO TB! And here we would have gone through nine months of drugs (and possible liver damage--not to mention the expense/time commitment for the monthly tests!) for nothing. Praise the Lord. Thank you to those who prayed already. God sure did answer!

Our first fundraiser!

This is the add my brother put together (along with sections of the letter we're sending to family and friends that will be on the back of the postcard) for the fundraiser he's doing for our family. I can't believe how wonderful he is! He even figured out how to put this on my blog and add the fundraiser section at the bottom of the page since I'm so crazy computer clueless!!!! Feel free to check it out. He's really hopefully about the outcome since 100% of profits go to us...I know we've really used his business in the past for Bibleman paraphernalia (really cheesy, but the boys love it), Narnia, and Veggie Tales stuff around birthdays and Christmas! Not to mention, I've ordered some great books at really great prices this way, too. If you can't find what you're looking for, you can always e-mail/call and my experience has been he's been able to find what you're looking for! One more way we feel loved!

Praise and Prayer

We have some great praises to report from today. First, we had our last homestudy meeting with Ruth. She informed me that she's almost ready to send the report to Laurel! She is definitely more of a blessing than we could have asked for! (Thanks to Adam and Carrie for the great recommendation.) Also, she gave us our police reports that we can use for our dossier and our birth certificates were delivered by UPS. OH, and we finalized the fundraiser my brother is doing for us through the end of January: ALL of the proceeds for books/products bought from his sight will go to our adoption when you use the given code. Is that awesome or what? He's ordering 1000 postcards tomorrow that we can start handing out, and I'll post the info on my blog. His sight is really great, too (though I'm biased). While I haven't done a side by side comparison, I think his prices are comparible to Amazon, he just doesn't have the used option that they do. What a great day!!! It feels so good to know that things are happening. All of this does not, however, make us forget about yesterday's news...

So, I've been sleeping with a man who has tuberculosis!!!!! Yes, you heard me correctly: Karl tested positive for TB. Now that the dramatic flair is out of the way (my favorite--old habits die hard, ya know), I will tell you the whole story. Karl went in for his routine TB reading and after two nurses looked at the results with consternation, the doctor was called in. Sure enough, it was a positive read. Then came the chest x-rays. This was the good news. The TB was not active. This just meant that at some point since his last negative test (perhaps before his last trip to Africa?) he came into contact with the disease. Now, if he ever comes into contact with it again--like when we travel to Ethiopia to pick up our daughter, for instance--he is much more susceptible to contracting it. SO, here's what he has to do. For the next nine months, Karl needs to take daily antibiotics (don't know how much that's going to be), then, because the meds tend to cause liver damage, he needs to go in for monthly screenings to make sure there are no problems. Last, since the meds also tend to deplete your B vitamins, Karl needs to take a perscription B vitamin each day. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!! There is so much worse, but it's a little overwhelming at the same time. Especially for these really-hate-to-take-medicine people!!! Prayers are appreciated :)

A week in the life of a paper pregnancy

I haven't posted in a few days and thought I'd give an update. I'm not feeling very funny today or poetic or anything of the sort, but I do have some progress to report on our adoption as well as some amazing news from America World Ethiopia's program. I'll start with our progress:

Our second homestudy was this past Wednesday with Ruth. I really wish I had taken a before and after picture to post here. The house was as spotless as possible with three small boys and my sanity still in tact. That evening, the house was back to its normal "pitiness." The sad thing is, I love cleanliness. Like my mom, it brings me peace. This, however, is not the season for that, I suppose. Anyway, I digress: back to the homestudy. Despite the spotlessness, we did not hide three basketfuls of clean laundry like our new friends at AW who also had their homevisit recently. Our laundry room counter was only half as full as usual with clean, folded clothes. I figured since the number of times I had laundry done up and put away in this house (going on 2 1/2 years here) I could probably count on one hand, I could leave it! ANYWAY, our visit was wonderful. Once again, Karl was here and she interviewed us individually while the other entertained Owen somewhere else--and Kole once he got home from preschool. This means the final required face-to-face visit will probably be done next week and only I will be needed (she thinks she has the required info already based on the two extensive interviews as well as our extensive pre-interview biography and parenting information). To give you an idea of what this "paperchasing" takes, here's what else we did this week:

1. Make copies at the library of MORE forms
2. Sign and send more stuff to America World
3. Write our letter we plan to send out to family and friends sharing our heart and FAQ
4. E-mail Laurel (our family coordinator at America World) MORE questions
5. Order both of our birth certificates (two copies each, just in case) from Indianapolis
6. Order and pick up two marriage license certificates
7. Take sample employee letter to Crossroads
8. Beg Dad for a fax/scanner/copier/printer for my birthday!
9. Talk to Dad (my boss) about the sample employee letter for CSS
10. Karl's doctor's appointment (drop off new dossier medical forms)
11. Karl's doctor's appointment again (TB test)
12. Schedule MORE Karl and Danielle doctor appointments
13. E-mail social worker (Ruth) guardian information
14. Keep in touch with new friends at America World Ethiopia's Yahoo Group
15. Celebrate with families from AW on their REFERRALS!

Do you get the point?!? Number 15 leads me to the last thing I want to mention: yesterday, after much prayer and some divine intervention (one--or two? people actually had dreams this would happen--exact numbers and everything!), four more families got referrals for their children. There were five children (that we know of) in all. I just cried this morning seeing the posts and feeling the excitement and overall emotion from these families...and the way the other families celebrated with them. GOD IS SO GOOD!

Bodily functions...why we need a little girl!

Several things have happened recently to make me more and more confident that our family could really use the positive influence of another female member. For those of you that are particularly weak of heart and find movies like Shrek offensive, discontinue reading this post. For the rest of you...here's a snapshot of life in the Black house:

1. One of the first things that Braden reported proudly after his first week of kindergarten: armpit farts. If you don't know what these are, perhaps you shouldn't ask. This new knowledge has caused many laughs in our household.
2. I was changing Owen's stinky diaper the other day and he started coughing and said, "That poop make me choke." (On a side note, he has also made this comment lying in bed with us in the morning after smelling my breath)
3. Braden and I were talking about me being a mom (versus a dad, I guess?!?) and what made me such. After a short anatomy reminder, he said: "I know another reason that makes you a mom." "What?" I asked. He replied, ""You have the stinkiest toots!" (The connection I'm not sure of, but I found it hilarious, nonetheless)
4. And there was the time not too long ago when I broke down and took the boys to Wal-Mart so Braden could buy a Star Wars toy with his hard earned money. While there, they spotted "Splat"--a gooey item in a little tub that made a distinctly distasteful noise. I decided (why do I do these things?) that I would humor them and purchase them. On the way to the check-out counter, the boys continually tested the new item, turning heads all around. Owen was the funniest. For a long time after, whenever he would hear a particularly powerful "noise," he would absolutely crack up laughing. They couldn't wait to show Daddy!

Where are the tea parties and dress-up and beauty shop playtimes when you need them? No where to be found in this family....at least not yet :) But a beautiful family nonetheless! For now I just need to go elsewhere for my girl time!

The Hardest Part of Parenting?!?

So, for the second day in a row I am home with sick children. I wish I could say this is totally rare, but, I think, when you have three little boys it is quite common...especially when these little boys have started school this year! When I called Kole's preschool yesterday to say he was sick, Mrs. Crobott said it was the fourth call for his class with similar symptons. Now today, Braden says he has a stomach ache and sore throat, too. Now, a small part of my mother's intuituion thinks he may be faking (especially since the mid-range fever that Kole has is mysteriously absent), but what if? So, here we sit at 8:30 in the morning watching Garfield the movie (and trying to establish a game plan for this dossier, researching all-in-one fax/printer/scanner/copiers, blogging...you get the point) I think the most depressing thing is that it's only October 9. So, in my mind, I see the long months of winter looming ominously in the future, one virus after another. (Did I mention this is the third day working out I will be missing and second Encounter--since last week Owen had a bad cold/little fever?)

One of the only things I remember from three years of high school Latin is the phrase "O me miseram!" translated "Poor miserable me!" So, I'm done o me miseram-ing, and ready to be thankful that I have three beautiful boys (even if they are sick and altering my normal schedule--how ridiculous of me!) I can only imagine the number of people who would love to be in my spot. So, in closing, I will dwell on a more productive Latin phrase--the only other phrase I remember--and focus on making each moment count....even if that does simply mean giving medicine, wiping noses, and lots of cuddling. Carpe Diem, every one.

Some great pics from last fall...I love our family.

I love my husband

Kole, Uncle Justin and Aunt Erica

Braden and Kole with cousin, Sophie
Outside the circus
What a cutie!
There's no one like Grandma Great
Grandad, Erica, Justin, Grandad and Grandma Great, Owen, me, Grandma, Braden, Kole

MOST OF THESE WERE TAKEN FROM OUR SOMEWHAT REGULAR THANKSGIVING TRIP TO CHICAGO WITH THE RIEGSECKER CLAN (MOM'S FAMILY). KARL WAS UNABLE TO JOIN US BECAUSE OF OFFICIATING A WEDDING HE HAD COMMITTED TO BEFORE WE SCHEDULED THE TRIP :( IT MAKES ME SO EXCITED TO GO AGAIN IN A LITTLE OVER A MONTH--THIS TIME WITH KARL! WHAT A HERITAGE WE HAVE!!!

Sweet sisterhood...and adoption progress

So, I just got back Saturday night from an AMAZING week with my precious college girlfriends. This is our sixth annual get-together (we missed one in there somewhere, but are going strong now!) I cannot begin to tell you how blessed I am by these friendships. Seriously! As my friend said, I think 99% of people do not truly experience this kind of community. Good community, yes, but not this. Anyway, just wanted to give a shout out (did I really write that?!?) to the Taylor T'leven (J/K...we'll come up with something great....those t-shirts are counting on it) for another one of the best weeks of my life. You each enrich me in amazing ways, and I know my life wouldn't be nearly as complete without you in it.

On an adoption note: I came back to an e-mail from our official family coordinator, Laurel. I also copied and dropped off our paperwork for the homestudy (which has been rescheduled to next Friday, 10/12) and had my doctor's appointment to make sure I'm healthy and don't have TB. Other than that, my adoption goals for this week: look more into doing a t-shirt fundraiser and talking to mom about an Arbonne fundraiser that my precious Liana said she would love to fly out from Portland and do for us. OH! And to look at all the stuff we should be receiving from America World any day now about our dossier. I told Karl I think we need to purchase a printer/copier for our house so I don't have to give my life savings to the library copier anymore (and leave the boys in the car while I'm doing it...don't call CPS).